Dwarf Ankylosaur

So, would anyone on my brand-new friendslist of *checks* five people be willing to look over a 1000-word piece before I post it? It's short, and it's not even really worthy of a beta except that I'm obsessive about that stuff. It's nowhere near as freaky as the last one.
It's a light humor piece. Well, what passes for humor in my head.
No, really.
No, really, I promise.